Getting to know you, getting to know all about you..

Dear Blogosphere,

Have you ever experienced an event in your life, or an occasion, that completely rocked you to the core of your being and gave you reason to start to reconsider what you thought was your life, your ideals, your dreams and your goals? Oh me oh my! I think I am experiencing this at this very moment.

At 5:48 AM, I woke up, with a smile on my face. I never wake up that early, and I most definitely never wake up that early with a smile on my face.

I’ve been sitting here for a while, looking out the window across the river and just… thinking. I can tell that it’s freezing cold outside because when I put my head against the window, it very nearly stuck to the glass.

I decided before going to work last night to call RHS (who, by the way, has given me permission to blog him by first name, which is Scott) and ask him where we’d be dining, because I didn’t want to wear jeans to some place really fancy, tho I figured considering the hour it would be, it would probably be some place really casual, if not downright sleazy.

Good thing I called because he’d managed to get us late reservations at The Blue Water Grill. If you’ve never been, go. And if you like a good cocktail, I highly recommend the Nightfall.

But I digress…

I went on to work, trying not to be anxious about everything. I had the bar area last night, which I love because people tip better when they’re a bit tipsy, so I figured I’d just focus on that, right? I’d stay busy with customers and side work and gabbing with the staff and not even give my date a second thought until almost time to go.

Yah, that worked out well.

Every time a new customer walked in, I’d turn really quick to see if it was him. Finally around 9, my friend Molly told me to just go in the back and get ready, she’d cover for me. And all evening I kept asking myself – ‘Self, why are you so nervous? ‘ 

And my inner voice would replay ‘Uhm because you haven’t been on a date since clingy man? Uhm because this guy is smokin’ hawt? Uhm because there was something really strong there on the phone last night and it scares you?’  (What, like you’venever have two sided conversations in your head? Suurree!)

He arrived promptly at 10 and we left just as promptly because he had a taxi waiting, which truly impressed me. I mean, do you know how expensive cabs are in this city?

Dinner was fantastic! We ordered our drinks and were going over the menu when he asked me “What’s your favorite food?”

“Oh that’s a tough one. I’m a pig.” I giggled.

“I think healthy appetites are sexy.” He said. (Score 10 points immediately! Hell Yah!)

“So you like chubby chicks?” I smarted off. 

He didn’t answer – just smiled and said “So, what is your favorite food Miss Chloe?”

“Well, if I have to choose just one, I’d say Lobster. Of course, I have several favorites but definitely Lobster ranks in the top five. Do they make a dish with lobster and chocolate?”

“Lobster it is then.”

He ordered for us, getting himself the Pan Roasted Diver Scallops, which he offered me a bite of and which were like little bites of heaven, and he ordered Live Main Lobster tail for me. Now, I have to confess, my little heart did a flip-flop at this point. I mean how can you not want to jump the bones of just squeeze a man who buys you a taxi AND lobster? Seriously!

I must interject here and confess that, after having spent so many hours on the phone with him, I was a bit worried that we would run out of things to talk about and the evening would be filled with those awkward, long moments of silence where you’re stuck sitting across from each other with nothing better to do than watch one and other chew. I really hate those moments.

But this was not the case.

Over dinner he suggested a game of 20 Questions to break the tension . It went something like this:

Scott: We’ll start with something easy. Favorite color?

Chloe: You call that easy? I’m an artist, remember? Hmm okay, favorite.. a blend of hot orange and hot pink.

Scott: Interesting. Where will I find roses in that particular shade?(Big smile. Did I mention he has a phenomenal smile? He does. Trust me.)

Chloe: Okay my turn. Uhm… favorite childhood memory?

Scott: Oh that’s really easy! It would have to be fishing with my dad.

Chloe: You like to fish?

Scott: Nope, can’t stand it. But I loved my dad and it was a great way to spend time with him, just the two of us.

(Big awwww moment!)

Scott: Okay my turn, this one is a bit tougher. Most influential person in your life?

I must have made a really scrunched up face because he laughed.

Chloe: Well, there’s my grandmother. I mean she was a “tough old bird”, real country woman. But probably I’m going to have to go with Mrs. Adams, my fifth grade teacher.

Scott: And why Mrs. Adams?

Chloe: Because she really caught on to my spirit, you know? And she encouraged me. When I had problems studying or didn’t understand something, she took the time to explain it to me. She would let me stand up at the back of the class to take my tests because I was such a fidget.

Scott: Nice.

Chloe: Yes it was. Okay okay, My turn. And I get two questions because you just asked two in a row. What did you want to be when you grew up?

Scott: What? No, I didn’t. It was merely an extension of the same question. (He laughed.)

Scott:  Retired.

I laughed. I mean, c’mon, that’s funny!

Chloe: Retired?

Scott: Well, yah. I mean, my folks were older when they had me and dad had already retired from the military and spent his days either golfing or fishing, so I thought that was what you did when you grew up. You mean to tell me, it isn’t?

We both laughed.

After that, the conversation was easy, the atmosphere was very comfortable and I found myself several times just getting lost looking at his face. You know, the expressions he makes when he talks about his dad, or his sister that lives near him and her children. I couldn’t help myself. I still can’t.

After dinner, he said that he wanted to take me for a walk, but his Southern Bones were strongly protesting the cold air and would I like to come back to his hotel?

My red flags went up. And he must have sensed it. He put his hand on my shoulder and said “To the lobby Chloe. They have a great place to just sit and talk.”

“Oh. Uhm, sure.” I said and I was embarrassed that my apprehension was so noticeable. So he got us a cab and we went back to Fancy Schmancy hotel and sat for two more hours, just talking.

He told me that he wished he didn’t have to go back home today, and I told him it was okay, that he’d be back soon.

“Actually, I’ll be back in a week. We’ve got a conference over at Super Huge Conference Center. I wasn’t really looking forward to it before.”

“Before?”

“Mmm hmm. Before now.”

I know I blushed. I could feel my cheeks turn fire engine red.

At the end of the night he said “Would you think I”m too forward if I wanted to exchange contact information? You know, email addresses, mailing addresses, etc.?”

“Mailing addresses?” I asked

“Well how else am I going to woo you with trinkets and flowers if I don’t know where to have them delivered?”

Now, Dear Blogosphere, I have never been one to believe in love at first site. And I’ve never believed in soul mates. And I most definitely have not been looking to get involved with anyone, especially someone who lives almost 800 miles away, but what I was feeling – am feeling - let me just say, at this point I was ready to give him my email, my street address and the secret code to my answering machine! Not even my roommates have had the code to my answering machine!

We exchanged information and he got me a cab home. He said he’d have taken me home himself, but he didn’t want to be pushy about seeing my place, and I could tell he was being nice and trying not to make me uncomfortable.

So, the evening ended with a promise that he would call me today before he leaves town, after he attends to some last minute things at the office. I went home, took a shower, put on a pot of tea and did some work on my collage. I was wired. Sleep was something in the far recesses of my mind that seemed like a pleasant, distant thought.

I ended up falling asleep around 4:30 and was back up at 5:48! Dear god, I will definitely need a nap today before work. I have the long shift tonight – 4:00 PM – 12:00 AM, and clean up, so I won’t be home until at least 2, if not later.

I called my friend Cher about the shipment I’m sending her on Monday and we talked about last night.

You know, she’s pretty wise, Miss Cher is. She told me “Chloe, just take it easy. Let it be what it is and become what it will.”

And she’s right. That’s what I need to do. I mean, this is not like me! I don’t get all giddy and giggly and wiggly inside thinking about some guy. I don’t spend time pondering ‘what -ifs’ and ‘maybe somedays’.  Or do I?

I do know that I’ve been trying to get some work done this morning and every few minutes his smile, or his face pops into my gray matter, or I can hear him laugh, and I cannot wait for next week to be here. And the entire time I’ve been blogging this post, I’ve been half-minded thanking Danika for introducing me to blogging, because otherwise this stuff would all be swirling around in my gray-matter searching for an exit, and half-minded wondering if I’m blogging too much?

Well, I’m going to go clean my room and try to sleep a bit before work.

Love always

Chloe Jayne